An Elf, a Dwarf, Two Wizards, a Priest and Lawman walk into a bar.
Some Dickhead named Ambrose hurls abuse before they get very far
A fight breaks out and someone miscasts a spell.
The band mutates into monsters, but hey, they’re playing very well.
But these hard motherfuckers aren’t putting up with this lout.
Ariana flips a table and they rock on out.
Niklas “Adjunt to the The Grand Archivist” Schulman apologises for his pretension
But, please, you gotta find his master’s missing invention.
The Arcane Orrery is potent and dangerous. It grants the power to predict.
And the Librarian’s gone absolutely mental ever since it was nicked.
It’s already in the wrong hands. But you were the last ones to see it.
And if anyone finds out it is all his fault, he’ll be fucked lickety split.
Niklas is quite stressed from the way it sounds.
Plus this thingy he wants is probably worth a shit ton o’ Crowns.
They’re heading back that way anway, so they answer in the affirmative
The poor sap looked so desperate the party saw no alternative
Besides it gives you an excuse; that thing that last had it is probably worth paying a visit.
Oh, that’s not the same creature that abducted you and orchestrated a mass ritual slaying, is it?
They set off from Altdorf with a purpose, they’ve got a Dwarf to escort
He’s got humours of the brain, and a whole lot of gear to transport.
Knows his way around a doorknob though, so that might come in handy.
When they left Auerswald last it did not look bright and dandy.
Definitely a fixer upper, the docks where decimated and the slums where toast
A lot of people died on Geheimisnacht, leaving a lot of ghosts.
The Skaven’s giant Ritual brought a city to its knees
Oh yeah and the hospice had some ‘ish’ with a vomit zombie disease?
Anyway, the town’s gonna need some work when you get back.
Best to hurry, the dwarf is a VIP, so don’t let yourselves get sidetracked.
For some reason you’ve been entrusted with a cladestine mission,
Either Lucas Hazleman vouched for you, or the General has shit intuition.
Keep the dwarf safe, and deliver the Witch Hunter General’s letter.
Forced to travel by carriage, a river barge would have been better
The Party got out of Altdorf safely, the designated “Danger Zone”
Still they stood watch, shot at scarecrows and prepared for enemies unknown.
But beyond the walls of the cities, past the farms, hamlets and abbeys with rosy cheeked ministers
Is the forest. Huge. Ancient. Foreboding. Dark. And Sinister.
All these lands may belong to the Emperor, upon whom his citizens depend
But if you ever go past the forest’s edge you’ll find the Empire ends.
The sun may be shining but in the dark shade it is cold.
And it’s a very long winding road to get to Auerswald.